http://www.athility.com/rorydoona/illustration/blog/?p=255
Noting the comments here and elsewhere about the limited nature of the political party’s straplines I have gone for something with help from artist and designer Rory Doona for something that hopefully says a little more.
That’s interesting.
There’s a lot that’s fundamentally right in there: Strong identity, the symmetry of odd numbers and not confusing the reader with quantity by limiting to five points, and one click buy me details. I like the inclusion of a range of colour, and the fairly toned down background with some variant in shading.
Where can it be improved? The centre branding could be moved towards the top, the five pitches polished and sized to match, some more tonal variation and texturing across the colour background, and chopping the verbosity when you’re closing the deal in the sell box. You could give some thought to a hint of comic book edge and pop appeal.
Apart from that I’m impressed. You’ve shown you’ve got insight and savvy in the past and this poster gets right behind that. It’s not quite what I’m looking for in terms of design and content but the overall shape is a big stride in that direction. Is it perfect? No. Could I run with it? Yes.
I was playing with colour schemes a couple of weeks ago and found red was a real swine as colour to base a colour palette on. Nothing really goes with it or everything ends up looking like a Nazi flag or FHM. Shifting to a different base opens options and sends different signals.
I’m not an anti-nuclear weapons sort of guy so that pitch doesn’t appeal to me but I’d agree different weapons platforms and relationships are worth exploring. Something like a Vulcan 2 and closer trade just shifts that ego monster off the table while keeping options open.
http://www.artofthetitle.com/2009/11/23/superman-batman-public-enemies/
It’s a dead project now but I was basing a full page launch trailer off the titles for Superman/Batman: Public Enemies. I was hoping for something as punchy and had a composer signed up to score the original music. I’m a bit bummed that went nowhere.
Who said politics had to be boring?
Just noticed you changed your masthead. You’ve chopped the sign and torso, and the crowd line is hovering around the middle. That messes up the composition in major ways and there’s no way it can be fixed without messing something else.
Ditching the sign and giving the crowd signs which spell out the branding can work. It gets you a better composition and also shifts the focus from the middle of the poster so that’s a win-win. You’d also need proper crowd detail and some background sketched in to balance it.
Another thing is you can jiggle with the pose of your own character and the posse in the foreground. Putting the focus off centre would add some dynamism and make the eye wander more. That would be the “rule of thirds” working for you and what makes photos interesting.
http://www.pxleyes.com/photography-contest/13284/rule-of-thirds.html
yes just did a quick and dirty until I get something that makes more sense visually
here is an updated temporary header
Cool. Reminds me of the Usual Suspects poster.
Just kidding.
Have to admit, this is a smart and original move. Certainly making Bristol West a bit more of an interesting contest.
There’s more design in Paul’s poster than the corporate Tory crap or the Liberals vaudeville crap. It’s a slight stretch but hits all the bullet points in a book I recommended some time ago.
I first read some of Paul’s propaganda ages ago when he highlighted a slogan one of the Liberals stole off me (and didn’t have a clue how to use). It was strategically sharp and blew some wind up their skirts like his Park Street topic. For an ad exec and tough talking Tory the other guy isn’t anywhere to be found. This poster continues to develop that mainline.
British politics doesn’t take design seriously. I suspect, it’s one reason why law is such a pile of junk and politicians have lost touch. One of the things I put at the centre of the online politics magazine I was designing and pitched to a third party who shall not be named is baking success into a project. Britain doesn’t do success but I see a lot of those elements running with Paul.
My final impression is I don’t think Paul is running at his best. He’s still got things to polish and more experience to acquire but that will come in time. He got some of the things about branding and culture we’ve discussed. That’s unusual and puts him at the cutting edge.
My final test is can Paul use his position to fix the faults in the ineffective state apparatus, fix my appalling “customer experience”, and deliver a public enquiry. I have no idea. I just know I’m fed up with talk, and suicide or leaving the country is is all I can think about at the moment. The system creates failure by design and Bristol needs a politician who gets that and *acts* on it.
Love the imagery and colour but I’m not convinced this says as much as it could. What will it be used for? Where will it be? I’m not keen on it all being in the third person if it’s supposed to be from you.
You could say HOW you actually plan on executing your points. For example, where it says “Paul will strive for a fairer, peaceful world,” you should say HOW.
Also, I don’t care if you’ve seen Labour transform health and education. What are you actually going to DO, Paul?
Every word needs to say something of value. It’s just a bit weak at the moment.
Good luck!
Charlotte
Of course this flyer is trying to engage with issues of policy and philosophy other material has and will go into more detail. I am concerned that politics is too often mired in the minutae and administration of public services and that we don’t talk enough about ideas. I am trying to make it clear where I stand on some of the big issues. The Labour Party was established to give a voice to the unheard and to speak up for a fairer world and I think we need to get back to some of that.
If you look through the posts on this blog you will find far more and detailed information on where I stand in detail on a range of issues. If you have a question unanswered by that you can always email me direct at thepaduan@aol.com
C
The whole thing about public services is that they should exist to serve the public and operate in the public interest. Where someone is a victim they should be supported and helped.
PS
You’re a big picture guy, Paul, but Charlotte makes some very good points. You have to take a step back and ask how each of the five statements break down and ask what *each word* says. That makes the *message* pop out more and brings you closer to the audience. Ultimately, what you *do* for the customer is what they’re buying.
I know this is hard because I can be a bit wilful and difficult at times but if you take a step back you can see the intent of what someone is trying to communicate. Behind that is what they want and how they feel about things and when you connect that’s where things start motoring. This is what some people call the X Factor. Bill Clinton had it. Cary Grant had it. Who’s to say Paul Smith can’t have it?
Another thing if you issue press releases is going through a similar process. You have to make each bullet point count, create interest and enthusiasm, and carry what it will do for the customer and be something they want to talk about. Ultimately, you’re creating a platform where the media and voters will talk about and promote you.
I had some big rant going about how public services and business fail. They’ve both bought into similar corporate cultures and until they get a clue then they’re always going to create failure until they run themselves into the ground or their customers flee. I’ve punched every button I can and in the process it destroyed me. They lost sight of the fact that they only exist to make *me* (and you) succeed.
How can I compete against a Housing Association CEO who lies and escapes his failure by jumping ship, or a police force who investigate themselves and write reports that exonerate themselves, or a local council that gets paid whether they succeed or fail? There’s a lack of *do* and the more they fail the less they want to hear of it so they kick the victim. Bottom line: they’ve got their priorities wrong but if you can drive *do* you’ll have a pitch people will buy.
Are you the new Michael Jackson? Can’t wait for the video.
He’s that or a bloody surprisingly good cover.
Fuck, yeah.
perhaps you two can be my backing singers (and Alex B too)
I’m confused. I thought you were Labour. Now it seems you are a “democratic socialist”.
What is the difference?
My Labour Party Membership card starts
“The Labour Party is a democratic socialist party”
Fair enough.
Mind you, if that leaflet dropped through the door then I’d assume you were a confused independent, not in any way associated with the labour party.
Or I’d note that liberal was given more prominance than labour, then I’d have to burn the leaflet as an anti-anti-smoking protest.
Is that what you are aiming for?
Cheers
Doug.
C and Charlotte
Of course the big picture sets the backdrop in terms of the things that I would support and the things I would initiate. I also believe that politics has to start in the community and you have to work with people at the grass roots level and see things through their eyes. All the glossy brochures and exciting statistics in the world don’t tell you what people really think about services or how what Government and others do really impacts upon peoples’ lives.
I would point out that I am the only Bristol West candidate prepared to open myself up in this way to debate and criticism.
PS
Some fair points Paul but taking that poster to the next level is also a test of what you can deliver. You’ve done well and I know doing anything well is hard so I’m not going to throw too much flak your way but sweating those details and being seen to bust your ass to do it says something as well.
I try to be clear about what I want and I know I can’t get everything but my life experience so far has been big promises and crowd pleasing with little do. I can’t afford so see another candidate just go bouncing off to Westminster and hugging trees if it gets their face on TV because it just misses the problem.
Here’s a basic one: I’ve been so beaten down my macho-management and disappointed by a dithering council I had to go through hoops to ask Social Services to help me progress a complaint about my heating and hot water being kaput. They never listened to me saying I needed help to go down to the HA office personally, and when they made their box ticking follow-up call just referred me to their idiotic leaflet and closed the case.
Yes, I know they hits their mission goals and ticked marketing boxes but they didn’t *do* the job I *needed*. Do you know it took me two days to recover from our meeting? That’s how bad this experience I’ve lived through has been. If I died today I doubt anyone would know until the welfare payments stopped feeding into my bank account.
Why is it my Housing Association gets given planning permission in some shared ownership sweet deal by the Liberals when one of them scoffed in my face at the facts on how they’d failed me? How come the other guy makes anti-bullying speeches in Parliament and appears anywhere where there’s a protest crowd but turned his back? Isn’t that the whiff of corruption and hypocrisy?
I’m not lending you skills or telling you this stuff just to exchange warm air but neither am I being particularly demanding. I’ve been lied to and disappointed too many times to have expectations. To be honest, if Bristol West gets an MP who just delivers what they say on the box I’ll fall out of my chair. Are you that guy? Dunno. That’s not my call.
C
I can only prove (or disprove) that by having the job, so I’m putting you in a Catch 22.
As a local councillor I always got votes far better than the local swing in Bristol I think that was because I worked very hard for people and stood alongside them against the bureaucracies and the jobsworths as well as providing a strong voice for the area – of course I am biased
You’re not putting me in a Catch-22. The test is already running if you haven’t noticed. No pressure but as I said, I’ll believe it when I see it.
At the moment I’m left praying for a miracle, or just hoping to wake up from the bad dream. There’s even times when I wish I could quietly die and wake up in paradise.
A glove puppet would do a better job than smirky and smarmy. Tinkering and undistinguished doesn’t even scratch that pair of clowns. A 1% improvement in outcome is 1000% more than they’ve delivered.
Oh, smirky fixed a bin lid. A FRIGGIN’ BIN LID. Jesus, wept.
Doug
if it dropped through your letterbox it would have another side which has the Labour logo on it 🙂
Ideally, you’d have the logo at the front. Maybe, on the sign. On the other hand, I hate being a brand whore.
Good design is effective because it’s good design. Cath and Doug make some good points in that respect.
Still, at least you’ve picked up the issue with slogans and get the importance of culture. That’s something.
Paul – if you’re expecting people to have to come for your blog or drop you an email for more info, then this hasn’t done its job. You absolutely must answer the question, “So what?”
“You believe in x, y and z Paul? So what? You think this and that Paul? So what?”
If you ask yourself this for every sentence you write, you’ll do well.
Employ a comms professional. That’s what they’re there for.
Charlotte
That is true to a certain extent but I am delivering people leaflets not books. I want to engage in debate not become a producer of tomes of propaganda, I am also keen for people to put forward ideas on how these things can be achieved.
I have publicly supported a number of campaigns that further these aims including, for example, CND for the removal of trident, Robin Hood tax to develop a fund to deal with investment in poverty reduction home and abroad…
The leaflet also gives a number of ways for people to contact and question me.
Dude – a word.
You’ve made a good effort with the poster and I’ll accept the extra detail can be carried on the back and followed up with discussion, and the fact you’re engaging here and via email is a good thing. But,…
It’s a bit obfuscatory to use the label but I’m a producer. I know management, design and marketing is part of my skillset, and I’m a customer as well. I’m not here to crowd you out but neither am I just some rube.
One real test of whether you listen and *deliver* is what you’re doing to raise your game with that poster. At the moment you’re getting egotistical and stalling. I’ve learned over the years that if someone can’t handle the little things it’s a bad sign for the big things.
I’m pushy and demanding for a reason. I suspect, you’re like me and need some direction and a kick up the ass sometimes. That last 99% is the difference between a generic piece of shit and a hit. Do you want to be a hit? If you do swallow it and deliver.
Christ almighty. You’ve done stuff and put yourself around. Great. But, I’ve heard all this politicians BS and whining before. Smirky and smarmy are full of it and you’re better than that. So why the effing hell are you bitching at the last hurdle? Get over it.
You’ll thank us later.
Charlotte,
You raise an interesting issue with our democracy, that our MP’S should be the type of people that have already made up their mind on solutions to problems and all they need is to get voted in and then off they go on their crusade, this is one of the biggest ideological flaws of our politics and something we must confront to make democracy work.
Real change happens when ordinary people mobilise around their beliefs from all across the spectrum and debate solutions together.
Working with Paul on this campaign I see how he differs in his approach, his focus is community and getting people involved in the debate, because in the long run this is when politics has always been at its strongest!
It breaks my heart to see so many people completely dismayed by democracy, we really wanna bring more people into politics and action, hope we have your support on this notion?
Rory
Oh and in answer to you question the “so what?” for this particular flyer is “Join the debate online” (we are working on the website for this now)
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article7066248.ece
Letwin obviously doesn’t read Paul’s blog.
His loss.